Wedding bells from hell
by Snape4everLove
Summary: Sometimes the best way to get married is not to attend your own wedding.


**Disclaimer:** This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.

 **A/N:** Not beta edited so all mistakes are mine.

Written for a monthly challenge.

Rules:

Minimum 650 word count for each chapter

June- "Will you marry me?"

* * *

Severus walked briskly, glancing in all directions, a frown on his face firmly set. He didn't have to hide and sneak around or run this much...well...in reality never in his life. Not even during both wars, or later when he was acquitted after the second wars and the majority of wizarding England thought that it is their duty to relive the world of his person.

He bit his tongue hard not to yell when spell pulled him in the dark alcove behind one of the tapestries. A soft hand pressed over his mouth. He wrapped his hands around his much shorter attacked and smiled, nuzzling his face against untamable curls.

It was pitch dark in the alcove and he couldn't see her, but he could sense her and he knew her body. The body that now pressed against his. He nodded and she removed her hand from his mouth. They stand still listening, and soon enough few familiar voices passed them.

The group wasn't in a hurry so they could hear a good portion of the conversation.

"Are you sure you saw him going in this direction?" asked Harry's voice.

"I'm sure." grumbled Ron "Can you explain to me again why do we have to make the party for the git?"

"Because he's marrying Hermione and we promised to be nice, Ron." sighed Harry. There was a snort, a sound between laughter and scoff, and they could hear Harry's annoyed voice again "You know, you could be a bit more helpful Malfoy."

"I could, but I do have at least some sense of self-preservation..." replied Draco's voice.

"Even your father and mine put their differences aside for this Ferret-face." snapped Ron.

"True, then again my father can defend himself from Severus, I don't have a death wish unlike the two of you airheads." they could hear the smirk in Draco's voice.

The group went beyond their hearing range. Hermione released one shuddering breath and he tightened his embrace. Leaning, he whispered in her ear.

"How are you holding out?"

"So far, no one died..." she replied in a whisper.

"How bad?" he asked

"I'll let you know after I meet with Molly and the rest of them this evening." she sighed. He could feel her shift, she moved and pressed her lips to his. "Go, before they return. Use the back passage, they won't go there."

"Are you sure?"

"Spiders, Ron's afraid of them. Go." she whispered and kissed him once more before pushing him out into the hallway.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

It was late that same evening, and he has spent most of the day hiding from his friends, new and old alike. Around dinner time they gave up on hunting him. He was just relaxing with a book when his wards shimmered.

He smiled, the only person he wanted to see was coming.

Hermione was the only one who could pass through his wards. It wasn't easy for him to accept, and it wasn't easy for her to convince him to even start...dating. He sneered at the word. But this mess - it was all on him.

He was the one who proposed, unsolicited and quite frankly out of the blue.

In the light of recent developments, that maybe wasn't one of his best ideas. His thoughts were confirmed when Hermione dashed into the room and threw herself on the sofa, sobbing.

"Hermione?" he asked carefully.

"They are impossible. They won't listen. They hijacked my... **our**...day. They ruined everything!" she sobbed.

He left the book and moved to sit next to her, touching her shoulder almost timidly. He never knew what to do when she was crying, luckily Hermione wasn't easy on tears. But, that made the current flood even more so serious.

"What happened? Can I help somehow?"

"Can you help me get rid of Molly, Narcissa - why is she even in on this? Ginny and Fleur and all female teachers except Minerva - she is the only one with a shred of brain and decency. She and Luna."

"I can. It won't be legal and I'm afraid we'll have a honeymoon in the Azkaban, but I can." he offered.

His heart shivered, she was supposed to be happy. _He_ was supposed to be happy. But now...they were miserable. What supposed to be a small, private ceremony turned into a circus.

"Ginny wants to invite her team, her **_entire_ **team to **_our_ **wedding! Narcissa booked - **_booked_ **some fancy venue! Molly, oh Merlin! Molly changed the specifications for the dress!" new flood of tears accompanied with almost a wail followed her words.

He held her in his arms, petting her hair and her back, waiting for the worst to pass. The silent tears soaked through his robes. His chest constricted. Five years after the war they became colleagues. It took them another three to start dating and additional two to come to this moment.

If he knew how - he would take away her sadness and her misery.

"Oh, and that is not all!" she exclaimed suddenly.

"What did they do?"

"Well, like I told you - Ginny thinks it will be a good publicity for us and her team if they are at our wedding since she already notified and called the _press_ to attend. Narcissa dislikes the idea of the wedding on the lake, I insisted on the Lake - so she booked some lake venue Merlin knows where! Oh! She also changed the date - _for the next month_!"

He pulled back with a jerk, his ears still ringing. He rarely saw Hermione angry and never to this extent. She was almost vibrating. He patiently listened while she continued.

"Apparently, the venue wasn't available for _tomorrow_. Molly and Fleur! Oh, they are a piece of work! They _re-designed_ the dress! It looks…" she started but her voice broke, dissolving in sobs once more. "It looks awful! I don't need a cake...in that dress - _I_ ** _am_ **_the cake_. And I wanted to get married on Litha, they don't even believe...and I..."

He hugged her again.

"What kind of dress you wanted?"

"I already have the dress, they insisted on the new one and then changed the design. Even Andromeda is on their side. Minerva and Luna tried to make them listen to me but they refused. It...it feels like they are re-making their own weddings through mine."

"And what do you want?" he whispered, his brain working fast.

"You! I wanted you and no more than ten to twelve of our closest friends, on the Summer Solstice. Intimate, warm - you know - _ours._ And all that is ruined."

She started sobbing again.

At the start they did plan small reception, but then Molly and Arthur joined forces with Lucius and Narcissa. Potter, Ronald, Ginevra and all the rest joined to _help_. People were added to the list, family members, friends, plus ones, business associates, colleagues, political figures, now apparently media and sports teams and none of listed were added by either one of them.

Daily Prophet held them on the front page in past few weeks. Those whom they considered as their _closest friends_ literally hunted them down. He endured all that for her, suppressing his temper, but this was the last drop. Until now, at least Hermione didn't cry.

He moved from her and slid next to the sofa on his knees. She watched him with trepidation. Clenching her hands in one of his he ran a gentle thumb over her tear stained cheeks.

"Hermione Jane Granger, will you marry me?" he asked, it was as hard as it was the first time, and cold fear coiled in his belly.

"What are you…" she blinked, confused.

"I asked...Will. You. Marry. Me?" he emphasized each word.

"I don't understand." she blinked again. "I already said I will."

"Do you want to?"

"Yes! Severus, I _do want to marry_ ** _you_ **. What I don't want is…" he pressed a finger on her lips.

"You said you already have a dress."

"Yes. Severus, what are you…" she started but stopped.

"Then go, get dressed and go to the Lake, East side near the forest. No one ever goes there. Firenze will let you pass. Wait for me there."

"Severus…."

"Litha starts in an hour and a half, that is enough time for you to dress up and for me to persuade Minerva and lure Draco and Luna. We are _getting married at midnight_. Even better, I wanted to surprise you and booked us a Portkey for our honeymoon." that was a lie but he could arrange it fast, people owed him favours. Originally, Lucius offered them his villa at the South of France.

"We are eloping?" she asked, her voice trembling.

"We are." he confirmed, "If you agree with…"

"Go! We will meet in an hour and a half." She smiled at him. Big, happy, bright smile that lit up the room like sunshine. He kissed her and rushed to Minerva's private quarters.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

The ray of sun woke him up. Next to him was a warm and very naked which. She stirred and sleepily smiled at him under the riot of curls. Her features plain as ever but radiant from happiness.

He was a lucky man.

"Good morning Professor Snape." she whispered.

"Good morning Professor Snape." he replied with a smile.

Elf popped up.

"Breakfast and morning papers." Elf squeaked and disappeared. Hermione frowned, he pulled back into a sitting position and smiled.

"I told them to bring us food and papers as soon as we wake up." he took the papers and called her to follow his example with the motion of his hand. "I have another surprise for you."

He gave her the paper. Above the huge picture of their friends with lost expressions was title: **Secret wedding - two war heroes married in secrecy and escaped from Europe leaving their "friends" shocked with sorrow**. She looked at him grinning.

"When did you arrange this? They are going to eat us alive."

"Last night, with Minerva." he replied nodding, "They will, but we are safe, at least for now."

"Come here Professor Snape, I want to consult with you on a matter of great importance." she gave him one mischievous look.

He quirked the eyebrow at her and leaned closer. She pulled him on her sliding them both down on the bed. The newspaper crumbled between them…


End file.
